10 Ridiculous Red Flags To Avoid At All Costs

The Reddit community compiled a list of red flags in both men and women that should be avoided.

1. Never Their Fault, Always Someone Else's

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“Yes, this is a huge red flag no matter what your relationship is with the person in question. Significant other? Red flag.Boss? Red flag. Employee? Red flag. Friend? Red flag. The list goes on but when you have someone that is never wrong and everything is someone else's fault you should avoid that person at all costs,” one user said.

Another said, “This. And if you stay with them, things will always be your fault, and you’ll be the one apologizing and doing something to make up for it.”

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2. Conveniently Matching Goals

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“When interests and life goals turned out to be 100% the same as yours after you have shared yours. Or changes as you talk about what is important to you,” one user said. “It's called mirroring and narcissists use this during the lovebombing stage to lure their victims,” another said.

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3. Extreme Jealousy

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“Really jealous. Everyone has a tiny bit or none at all. But people really jealous will make your life hell,” one user said. “When they accuse everyone else of being jealous all the time,” someone else added.

4. Ignoring Boundaries

“When talking to men on apps I like to give them a small insignificant “no” just to see how they react. For instance, if they ask for my number too soon (like the first 10 minutes of chatting) I tell them that I'm uncomfortable giving my phone number to someone I don't know yet and ask to continue chatting through the app. It's not a lie, even though there are other solutions. Most men react in a really nasty way and show their true colors. Like, really nasty it's sometimes scary (which validates my fear of giving out my number to anyone). I've told about this method to my male friends and they all thought it's manipulative on my part, until they hear the reactions I got and agreed it's a good strategy,” one woman shared.

“I'm a guy and this is my strategy nowadays. I've been unmatched over it, but when someone asks to move off the app after just one or two days it's a huge red flag for me. I want to keep my socials private for a time and people are so quick to be integrated into your life anymore. It's terrifying because the last girl I dated (two weeks in total) was calling me babe/baby a week in, trying to get me to meet her family, and always wanted me to go out to a bar instead of somewhere else (I'm 29 and she was 30). I've always been terrified of breaking it off with people, but this woman was the tipping point for me,” a guy chimed in.

5. Can't Be Alone

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“Something I mention often: If they can't handle themselves when you're not available. What I mean by that is if you want to go do something alone, and they take that as a personal insult and badger you the entire time you're doing it. You both MUST be cool with having your own time/space/hobbies without the other one freaking out about it,” one user shared.

6. Imbalance of Effort

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“When you are the only one who is always giving in the relationship without it being reciprocated leaving you to feel constantly drained. Just to be clear, it is not the other person's job to make you feel good, but relationships are about balance. When you are the only one doing the work, time for you to work on yourself,” one user said.

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Another chimed in, “Been there, read the book, got the t-shirt. There comes a point from my experience, where your relationship can't actually progress if they're not putting in the required effort. If that's the case, then time to break it off, as if it's not progressing it's either stalling in an endless limbo, or regressing which is even worse. Also shows a sheer lack of care, and that in itself can be soul destroying.”

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7. Can't Accept That They're Wrong

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“They cannot accept they were wrong about something. My bf has a buddy that cannot stop trying to argue his point, and when he is shown evidence, he tries to flip the script and say that was what he was trying to say all along,” one user said. Another added, “I have a step cousin exactly like this. You would say something like “I personally wouldn't want to work 12 hour shifts” and it would become a whole 2 hour debate that wouldn't stop until he either got bored, or I just gave up and told him 12 hour shifts are better. He couldn't accept being wrong and he couldn't accept people having a different opinion from him. Our friendship eventually ended when he went behind my back and messaged a client I was building a website for because he didn't like the shade of blue I used for the header.”

8. Telling Small Lies Early On

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“If you catch them lying about dumb things early on, they will lie about everything down the road, you can be sure of it,” one user said. Another added, “This one. Lying is the biggest red flag of all in a relationship. You can be a lot of terrible things and I’ll accept that, but you can’t be a liar. If you’re a liar, I don’t even know who you really are.”

9. Overly Critical of Others

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“Anyone who’s overly critical of others. They’re insecure and competitive and rarely happy,” one user said. “When I was in grad school there was a person in my cohort who was like this. They would put people down, often behind their backs, and even in front of faculty sometimes. They sought out leadership positions that got them close to faculty and always seemed to be starving for validation from them. All the while, they were extremely insecure and anxious- so much so that it was tangible, like you could feel their anxiety when they were in the room,” another user shared.

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10. They Want A Mind-Reader

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“Anyone who says they are unhappy with you because you don’t surprise them with spontaneous gifts or dates. These people want a very specific type of relationship and expect you to fulfill the role without being told what that role is, only that it exists. These people are not interested in you. They’re interested in a version of you they made up in their head,” one user said. Another added, “This is the first one I've seen that may be more prevalent in women than men. The rest of this thread is just gender-neutral annoying or toxic person traits. And yes, men can do this too, I just think it may be more common for women, while the rest of this thread definitely is not.”

Read the original thread here.

This article was produced and syndicated by Max My Money.


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