He Told Her She Needs To Go to the Gym, Is He Fat-shaming Her or Is He Right?

A guy shared his story of telling his girlfriend she needed to go to the gym after finding candy wrappers when she told him she was eating clean. We'll call him Noah.

Putting in the Work

Noah explained that two years ago, his doctor told him that he needed to lose some weight because he was pre-diabetic and at high risk for developing cardiovascular disease. His BMI was also really high, so for two years he worked out five days a week and got into shape. During his fitness journey, he met his girlfriend at the gym.

After they got into a relationship, Noah said he continued working on himself and got into good shape. He said his girlfriend, however, stopped working out altogether. Noah said he didn't bother her about it because he doesn't believe you have to be hyper-fit to be healthy, but then things kept getting worse.

She went to the doctor and he told her that she needs to do something about her weight. During this period, Noah encouraged her to go to the gym but said she never made an effort. Noah said this wasn't really the issue, though. The issue was when she came to him asking him to help her eat healthier so she could work on losing weight.

Noah said he started making healthy meals for her and trying to make them taste good. He noted that this took a lot of time for him. He tried new recipes and different things for her to try. He wanted to make it as easy as he could for her. Before, he would just make batches of chicken and put them in the air fryer before eating, but she didn't like that.

Related: 10 Red Flags To Avoid in Men and Women

Deception

Despite his effort with the food and her going to the gym, she told him a couple of days ago that she wasn't losing weight. She promised that she hadn't eaten anything extra and she was going to the gym more often. The other night, Noah was looking for his PS5 controller and opened a side-drawer in the loft. In it, he found new candy wrappers and chocolate. He confronted her and she admitted that she had been eating sweets and would eat out when she was at work.

Noah said at this point, he was frustrated and exhausted and told her she needed to go to the gym. She started crying and saying he was fat-shaming her. Noah said he knows how hard losing weight is but that she isn't even trying. He said she's eating whole jars of Nutella behind his back. He told her he can't help her if she can't help herself.

Was Noah fat-shaming her? Was she wrong for hiding her true diet from him? How would you have reacted in this situation?

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