Sometimes someone will say something to you, and it gives you the instant “ick.” Women often get this feeling when men say certain things to them. Things that make women raise their eyebrows and wonder why God made them attracted to men in the first place.
1. “You Sound Like My Mother”
“I think my husband has used this maybe once in the 10 years we've been together. I know it made me mad, I think I was so mad I turned red,” one person said. Someone else asked why women would find this phrase offensive, and the women explained that it's often used in a negative way to highlight a perceived flaw. Especially when that woman has a bad relationship with her mother, and her mother has many undesirable traits.
2. “Just Calm Down”
“Telling an angry person to calm down is just pouring fuel on the fire. It's very effective if that's what you want to do though,” someone pointed out. There has probably never been a single time in the history of that phrase being created, that anyone has calmed down when they were told to. Especially when they were already calm and speaking seriously and someone tells them to calm down anyway.
3. “Smile”
“I get this so often from strange men (and the occasional older woman, but it's almost always men). The worst part is when other men hear me complain about this and tell me it's no big deal and that the men telling me to smile just want me to be happy. They somehow do not grasp that these men telling me to smile would pretty much never dream of saying that to a man they didn't know, and also my mental state is not their business, and I should be allowed to walk around with a neutral face without people critiquing it. Plus, if I walk around smiling, creepy men will take it as an invitation to say creepy things and excuse it by saying I was smiling at them and therefore inviting it,” one person pointed out.
As the person stated above, people, both men, and women should be free to express themselves however they wish on a day-to-day basis. Not many people walk around smiling just because, and it seems almost insensitive to ask someone to smile when you don't know what's been going on in their life.
4. “I'll Do It Later”
“I'll do it later……No you won't and I'll get treated like the bad guy if I mention it again,” one woman pointed out. The premise of this should be simple. When someone asks you to do something and you say you'll do it later, either follow through and do it, or don't be upset when they ask again. Simple.
5. “Is It Your Time of the Month?”
“I get that, we all wanna do better but when it's not my time of the month and I get asked this just because I have a strong opinion in something is annoying,” one woman said, responding to someone else who pointed out that sometimes it's a valid question and can help some women become aware of their imbalanced hormones.
However, this phrase can also be used with a negative and condescending tone, which is when it becomes a problematic phrase to use.
6. “Pretty Good for a Girl”
“I help at an auto mechanics with my brother. People get shocked when one of the females change a tire or do something simple like change the oil. It's not that hard. I don't even gender them because some of the females are better than the guys. I don't say this. Women are just as capable as men are,” one guy pointed out.
Sometimes men act like certain things, like being a mechanic, is something only men are capable of learning, which is just untrue. If it can be taught, it can be learned.
7. “You're Just Insecure”
“‘Insecure' mostly because almost every man I dated used this to Gaslight me. The guy I dated was dm-ing my hot best friend behind my back and when I called him out on it, he tried to play the “oh it's innocent. I didn't do anything wrong except just react to her Instagram stories” card (which was all fire and thirsty reactions btw) and called me insecure for being rightfully upset he was thirsting over my best friend. A lot of men would do something blatantly do shady/sketchy things then use ‘insecurity' to justify their behaviors,” one woman shared.
Men often default to the insecurity card when they've done something wrong and need a quick redirect.
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8. “Because I'm a Guy”
“When they use “because I’m a GUY” as an excuse for not knowing how to do things, when in reality they just don’t want to learn,” one woman said, clearly exasperated. Like c'mon Steve, being a guy doesn't mean you don't know how to turn a vacuum on or push the start button on the washing machine.
9. “Boys Will Be Boys”
“This one grinds my gears so bad. A boy misbehaved towards me in high school and I was so angry I told the teachers. Had a chat with him and the teacher and after a while I saw his face change; he realized what he did was wrong. Just as we shook hands the teacher went “but you know what boys are like…” And his face turned immediately into a victory smile. I was fuming. I still fume and it's 15 years ago, like how could she, she was a teacher!?” one woman ranted.
This phrase is often used to justify misbehavior by boys. Just because they're boys, though, doesn't absolve them of accountability when they do something wrong.
10. “Women Just Want Attention”
“‘Women just want attention' says the dude who’s been in my DMs literally for over a year with no response from me just talking to himself. Yea..it’s just women though,” one woman said. There could be an argument made here that when women post certain kinds of photos on social media, they're looking for attention, but so are the men that sprint into their DM's moments after viewing said photo. Doesn't make the phrase any less annoying, though.
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